On becoming, the power of subtraction, and focus
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The JD Letter April 5, 2025 "First you must let go of who you think you are. Only then can you become who you're meant to be.” – Lao Tzu At some point in his journey, Santiago—the main character in the book The Alchemist—realized the journey wasn’t about becoming someone. It was about letting go of everything that wasn’t him. That doesn’t mean you won’t face challenges or feel lost along the way. The harsh truth is that you can't learn all the lessons beforehand. You learn a lot about what you do want out of life after you experience what you don't want. You discover what type of career you enjoy after going through tons of jobs that made you miserable. You realize you need to taste unhappiness to recognize what happiness means to you. And so it goes in nearly every area of life. In most cases, what you wish you knew ahead of time can only be learned after you've walked through the experiences you've been trying to avoid. Santiago worked at the crystal shop. He spent long days polishing glass and counting customers. Deep down, he knew it wasn’t what his soul wanted. Still, through that experience, he learned something invaluable: He learned precisely what he did not want. That clarity was harsh but essential. He had to feel dissatisfaction, confusion, even despair, before fully understanding the path that would make him feel alive. There is no perfect path. There's only the path you choose, shaped by missteps, setbacks, and detours—each necessary to guide you closer to who you're meant to become. Drowning in DistractionIn the spring of 1845, Henry David Thoreau began to think that he might want to be a writer whose words truly matter. But as he became aware of the society around him, he saw a troubling pattern everywhere:
Thoreau began to doubt himself but eventually reached a conclusion: He could only find clarity by stepping away from the noise and shallow routines of society. He was criticized, doubted, and even mocked. But like many great thinkers, his ideas proved far more valuable with time. Thoreau wanted simplicity. He was convinced that true wisdom and insight could only emerge from silence, solitude, and deliberate living. He stripped his life down to its bare essentials: a small wooden cabin, minimal furniture, a simple fireplace, basic tools, and his books. He grew his own food, bathed in the pond, and spent days exploring nature, reading, writing, and thinking deeply. With fewer distractions, he found his attention sharpened. Small curiosities fascinated him. The sounds of birds, the flow of seasons, and the clarity of stars reflected in the still water of Walden Pond. Months turned into two years. The deeper he went into solitude, the clearer his insights became: “I went to the woods because I wished to live deliberately, to live deep and suck out all the marrow of life, to put to rout all that was not life, and not, when I had come to die, discover that I had not lived.” He learned firsthand the price most people unknowingly pay when they let distractions run their lives. Society, he realized, was trapped in constant busyness, mistaking activity for meaning. Thoreau saw that depth was rare because few allowed themselves the space and silence required to cultivate it. Thoreau’s experiment taught him what truly mattered. He discovered joy not in complexity but in simple rituals, quiet reflection, and pursuing genuine curiosity. It was never one profound insight, but rather countless small moments of clarity that connected him deeply with life’s true purpose. In a fast-moving world, Thoreau showed that the boldest act was to slow down, live with intention, and follow his curiosity. He left behind a powerful legacy captured in one truth: “It is not enough to be busy; so are the ants. The question is: What are we busy about?” To put it simply: If you don't have 30-60 minutes to yourself each day you will never follow your curiosities. If you never follow your curiosities, your ideas stay shallow ideas because you never add the depth that comes with diving into rabbit holes. If your ideas stay shallow, there's not enough force driving you to change behavior and become the person you wish to be and live the life you wish to live. And not becoming the person you wish to be hurts. It makes you feel numb, dull, passive, and weak. You don’t need to have it all figured out. You just need to slow down long enough to hear the part of you that already knows the way back home. Your soul is starving for less"No man can swim ashore and take his baggage with him." - Seneca Environmental psychologist Rachel Kaplan noticed that people in cities often felt mentally drained. She began to wonder why. "Could our overstimulating surroundings be draining our cognitive resources?" "Could nature be the antidote?" She and her husband, Stephen Kaplan, were fascinated by a simple observation: People felt better after spending time in nature. Not just emotionally—but cognitively. They could focus better. Solve problems more easily. Think more clearly. This led the Kaplans to develop what’s now known as Attention Restoration Theory (ART). According to ART, our brains use two types of attention:
The Kaplans believed that nature gives our focused minds a chance to rest. Nature gently holds our involuntary attention—without demanding too much from us. To test their ideas, the Kaplans conducted a series of studies comparing people who had access to natural environments with those who didn’t. In one famous study, they asked office workers to rate their job satisfaction and mental fatigue. The workers with views of trees and greenery reported:
Even a view of a tree through a window had measurable benefits. Other researchers followed suit. In one study, people who walked for 50 minutes in a park did better on memory and focus tests than those who walked on a busy street. But Kaplan wondered: Could the benefits of nature go beyond mood? Could they actually change the way our brains process information over time? More recent neuroimaging studies now support that possibility. Research shows that time in nature calms the part of the brain tied to worry and negative thoughts. Too much screen time and city noise do the opposite—they raise stress and drain your mind. Rachel Kaplan’s legacy is this: If you want to think more clearly, feel more deeply, and recover your sense of self—you don’t need more stimulation. You need less noise, less distraction, and more space for your mind to wander. As Kaplan and her team concluded in their research: “Natural environments support recovery from mental fatigue. They enable reflection and foster a sense of clarity.” Simplicity can be revolutionary. And if you push very, very gently—toward stillness, nature, and what quietly calls to you—you change. Not just in how you feel, but how you think, focus, and become. Clarity about who you're meant to be comes from removing what distracts you. Say No to 1,000 Good Things"The healthy man has 10,000 goals. The sick man has 1 goal." - Naval Ravikant In 1997, Apple was dying. The company had dozens of products. Each one slightly different. Too many computers. Too many accessories. Too many teams working on things that didn’t connect. The business was bleeding money. The vision was scattered. And no one could answer the most important question: “What does Apple stand for?” That year, Steve Jobs returned to Apple. He walked into a product strategy meeting, sat quietly as the executives ran through slide after slide of specs, features, and models. Everyone was proud but Jobs wasn’t impressed. Finally, he stopped the presentation and asked a simple question: “Which one of these products do I tell my friends to buy?” Silence. No one knew. Not because the products were bad—but because there were too many. Too many options = no clarity. Too many directions = no direction at all. That's when Jobs stood up, walked to the whiteboard, and drew a grid with two columns:
He circled the four quadrants and said: “We’re going to focus on four great products. That’s it.” Everything else is canceled. Jobs cut over 70% of Apple’s product line. Entire departments were shut down. It was brutal—but necessary. Because Jobs understood what few people don't: Focus isn’t about saying yes. It’s about saying no to 1,000 good things so you can build one great thing. That decision to simplify things saved Apple. It set the stage for the iMac, iPod, iPhone, and the biggest comeback in tech history. Most people think more options give you more freedom. But that’s a lie. Multiple options can be a trap. They overwhelm you. They dilute your energy. They stop you from building momentum. If you’re feeling stuck, struggle to focus, or scattered—it’s probably not because you don’t have enough opportunities. It’s because you haven’t picked one. Pick a path. Let the rest go. Movement creates meaning that indecision never does. And sometimes clarity only comes when you’re brave enough to say no to everything else. As a kid I used to have one dream—to play basketball in the U.S. But as an adult I have multiple tabs open and struggle to focus. Today’s newsletter was my best attempt at finding my way back to clarity and focus—and hoping it helps you do the same. I truly did miss writing these newsletters for you. Here's what I was up to during my break on my birthday month:
I’m slowly coming back to that feeling I had as a kid. Not trying to replicate the dream. But remembering the focus. The simplicity. The deep sense of what I want out of life. That feeling is rare. And right now, I’m trying to protect it. Maybe you’ve been feeling overwhelmed and a bit lost lately. If so, I hope today's letter meets you at the right time. Until next time, Jess Inspire, Empower, Transform. P.S If you enjoyed reading this letter, please share it with someone you love. |